001Good evening. I'd like to call the Stonington Board of Education special meeting to order on October 25th, 2022 at 700 p.m. I'll ask Mr. Donny Hugh to lead us in the pledge of allegiance. Please sir to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands. One nation under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all. Thank you. So, uh, just to couple of housekeeping notes. Um, we are almost at capacity in the room. So, I'd like to remind everybody in a case of an emergency, we have three exits to this room. One door right there, one right behind me, anyone right to my left, please keep that in mind. Um, so the board meeting uh is held this uh the board meeting is held this evening to hear
002from our superintendent on a parent concern that was brought to her attention, her response to it, and finally her recommendation to the board if such concerns uh brought up in the future. So tonight, the board is not meeting to change a policy or to introduce a new policy. We are gathered to listen, to learn from this moment. And if there is a policy to be changed, our policy subcommittee or teaching and learning subcommittee can take those learnings back and can bring them up to a board vote. All people who wish to speak this evening must be Stonington residents. You are limited to two minutes per person, an hour in total for comments. Please out please fill out a form that's available right there by the podium. If you wish to speak, list your name, your
003address, the town, and the zip code. Mr. Kelly will have that list and we'll call you to speak after we conduct the business on hand. Sergeant-at-arms. Please note that your opinion matters. And I ask you that we please practice civility and respect in our comments. We will not tolerate comments that mention teachers. teachers names, teacher positions, or any SPS staff members by name or position, please refrain from that. So, first I'd like to turn it to the superintendent school, Mariam Butler. Thank you, Farooq. Before I formally make my recommendation to the board, I want to clarify um something that has been misrepresented in the press. I have never delivered a universal directive to remove all pride flags or any other flags from Stonington classrooms. I have asked building administrators to deal with individual classroom teachers
004to thoughtfully and respectfully um allow the proper space and time for a concerned parents interpretation of the current board policy to be researched. The Stonington ED Education Association graciously partnered in this process. All parents and all families deserve the respect to be heard even when opinions on important social issues are divergent. This is an opportunity for adults with differing opinions to model civility and respect for all of our students and community members. After speaking with attorneys, attorneys from two separate law firms, I feel now that I have the information I need to make the following recommendation to our board of education. After seeking additional legal counsel, working with the Stonington Education Association, hearing from numerous families and community members, and indirectly from our students, I recommend that the board of education finds the display of
005pride flags in Stonington classrooms and in school buildings falls outside of the current board's policies specific to partisan political displays, influence, and political messaging within our classrooms. Plainly, existing policies do not apply to pride flags. These these flags are statements of diversity, equity, and inclusion that cross party lines and are not partisan. We demonstrate diversity, equity, and inclusion work in many ways, including in our curriculum. Displaying the pride flag is an important visual reminder of our commitment to that work. It's in keeping with the board of education's diversity, equity, inclusion second goal of addressing those issues and uh that's my recommendation for action and discussion by the board of education this evening. Thank you. Um move to uh Heidi Simmons if you have any comments. I do. I'd like to make a statement concerning our
006gathering here tonight. I support the return of the rainbow flags to the classroom. First, because many of these flags were gifts to teachers from the club of Alliance for Acceptance, to remove these flags appears punitive to a community which has experienced painful rejection. And second, I support their return because I've reflected on the positive history of this flag and the spirit under which it was created. In 1978, Harvey Mil, a at first a Goldwater conservative and also the first openly gay political official, tasked a fellow gay artist and Vietnam vet, Gilbert Baker, to create a symbol to note and celebrate the unnoted, understated, and often harassed gay population from From his military service, Gilbert Baker had found the waving flag to be a rallying crowd. And then, since the rainbow was a sign of hope,
007both historically to many cultures and intuitively to young children, Gilbert Baker combined the two and the rainbow flag was born. Harvey and Gilbert would wave this flag to mobilize gays and their supporters under a symbol of hope. and returning the rainbow flag to the classroom. It should be done as a gesture of hope and bonding as was the original intent of Harvey and Gilbert almost 50 years ago. Neither were engaged in a political party agenda. They were engaged in acknowledging and safely including a whole community of people who had previously had an unsafe invisible status. So yes, put back the rainbow flag with its original intent and shake it loose from its current use as a political tool. With its return, I look to the administration to assure the board and the stakeholders and our
008students that not another flag nor poster nor symbol will be permanently placed in a classroom without establishing a specifying new policy. a policy where if a permanent visual is placed in a classroom, it should correlate with andor enhance instruction of that class curriculum according to the curriculum assessment guide which has currently been established by the teaching and learning committee. That being said, that being said, I'd like to recommend an editorial change to the language in the sixth paragraph from the bottom of the board of education's resolution. The current language refers to the LGBTQ pride flags. I would like to recommend we change that to the LGBTQ rainbow flag as that is consistent to the history of the symbol. Thank you, Heidi. Uh, Mr. Espazito have nothing to say. Thank you, Sarah. Mr. Are we still
009specifically on excuse me specifically on the superintendent's recommendation or are we on the board resolution? Uh correct on the superintendent. Okay. Nothing on that right now. No, thank you. Um so my my comment is that every family has the right to be heard and um I believe that the process that was followed was within the reasonable expectation of neutralizing a situation until we investigate a situation. Um, we as a board cannot make decisions outside of a board meeting. This situation did not rise to a board level until October 13th during our regular board meeting. So, the board cannot make decisions or meet without a notice in advance and a reasonable expectation of researching an issue. So, may I ask my fellow board members of a motion in support of the superintendent decision to uh return
010the the pride flag to the specific classrooms that was removed from motion to accept the superintendent's recommendation. Is there a second? Second. Are there any discussion on the motion? All those in favor, please indicate by saying I. I. I eyes have it. It was a unanimous decision. Thank you. Next item on our agenda, I've uh presented the uh board with a resolution and I would like to hear your feedback on it and I'll go back the same order. U Mrs. Simmons, if you can repeat just your ask on this change here. here say teachers and employees of the district are committed to display the rainbow as thank you Mr. Espazito any comment? I just was curious. It says board of education resolution number and there's no number there. Should that I I wasn't sure if
011there was prior resolutions made by the board. So I would you know that's I I did not bring it up to the administration to research it first. So I'd like to research that answer first. That's it. Maker. No comments on the resolution. Mr. Agnella. Uh yeah, one question and I'm curious to get maybe Maryann's feedback on this specifically, but um I'm unsure of uh on the very last uh paragraph maybe to call it the first clause um I'm unsure of the precedent for this, but the so the first of the two clauses appears to address and perhaps even direct even implicitly uh that the teachers of the district do something. Um, so Maryanne as a superintendent works for the board and is our point of contact for the district and I I think that we
012should follow the chain of command and proper order of communication channels and address any and all uh perceived directives to her um instead of skipping her and other levels of administration. Um to uh the phrase in general specifically the uh the part saying provided it is age appropriate that's really vague. Uh we don't define age appropriate. It's very subjective. Um, plus I think the content in the resolution and around some of the issues that are being discussed tonight at the very least are tangental to topics that are covered in health classes. Um, and according to the Connecticut Healthy Living Framework, which we use to model our health classes, um, too, uh, sexual orientation doesn't even come up until the middle high school grades. So, I'm curious what age appropriate would look like in regards to
013this resolution in the lower grades because it's not even in the standards until about sixth grade. Um, and then number three, since we're saying the flags are a symbol of inclusion, um, I fear that the clause could by accident lead to exclusion if a teacher decides not to discuss the resolution in class. I wouldn't want to make any teacher feel excluded or uh to be seen as exclusionary in the eyes of in the eyes of others. Um, some teachers may feel uncomfortable or just unqualified to discuss this. Um, and I wouldn't want them seen accidentally uh as exclusionary. Um, so I guess my suggestion is like I understand the the intent of the presence of that first clause in that last paragraph, but I I think it might miss the mark uh a little bit.
014Um, but I I like the latter clause. So my suggestion suggestion is to delete the first clause, but leave the latter clause referencing counselors. Thank you, Dan. Mr. Kelly, thank you. Um I don't know if we should probably had read this resolution and um seconded it before we discussed it, but um seeing how we're discussing it, I will uh give my comments uh hopefully keep them brief. I don't have a prepared statement. Um, but obviously this has uh touched a nerve in our community and it touched a greater nerve across anyone that read an article about this. And I personally um feel sad about it that this happened. I mean, we might have gone through the proper procedure. we might have taken him out of a few classrooms until it was resolved, until we had
015um an appropriate attorney's opinion that we um went with or what have you. But I fear that if and I walked in with the parent and it was a point of discussion in their house and I'm sure it's been a point of discussion in a lot of people's houses in the community that hopefully some of our children have not been impacted by this and cause them to sit back and say, "Hey, wait. What's going on? What is my school district about? Uh what is my school about? What is my classroom about?" Um, so I personally wanted to apologize to any student or family that uh was affected by this. I mean, we were all affected by it, some more than others. Um, and you know, I guess with having a little or a lot of
016controversy, it it brings us together and it allows us to have a a conversation and to to do a little bit of a, you know, some of us might sit back and relax and think that everything's all great and and rosy, but in reality, sometimes it's not. And there's no reason why a community can't come together and discuss an issue like this. Um, but as a board of ed member, you know, in this being representative of our district, although we did go by the proper channels and the proper procedures, I think we got a wrong opinion. And as I stated back in December or January when we talked about our attorney um I talked about it the fact that an attorney only gives his or her opinion or their opinion. It's not a legal opinion.
017It's not you know it's only the attorney's opinion. And you know, so I hope we come out of this meeting into our next board of ed meeting or whatever down the line and and review our um attorney's opinions and make some decision from there. But although I said I wasn't going to say much, I went longer than I thought. So, uh, thank you for listening. Yeah, I can you hear me? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, I I liked everything on the resolution. I also with Kevin, I just had a question about um the verbiage on the last part of the resolution, uh the last paragraph there. I didn't um just some of it was unclear to me. I don't I didn't know if it was something that goes through the policy committee or something that we
018vote on tonight as far as um when this being discussed in class, like what class would it be discussed in and everything like that. I just wanted a little bit of clarity on that. Uh thank you. And I yeah, I did ask for comments and we can open it for discussion after we ask for a motion on a vote. I asked for comments because I haven't had the chance to speak to any of my board members about this res proposed resolution. Um all thoughtful comments and I appreciate them and I um we can amend it to address the um comment by Mrs. Simmons as well as the uh comment that Mr. and Mr. Donahghue made uh to where we strike the first sentence and leave it as students are to be made aware uh uh
019that district counselors are available to discuss subject contained in this resolution. Um the the the the fact remains that um this issue has uh caused angx uh within our community, angst within the LGBTQ community and and the the the purpose of the resolution uh proposed resolution is to um let them know that we are here, we see them, we hear them and we value them. and that is in our community of uh Stonington that is in our s Stonington public school staff as well as in our student that are our priority in everything we do. Um so that's really the purpose of the resolution um to let them know that um when these things happen, we're there and we're looking out for them and for the community. Um it's it's not easy to go through
020this process, but like uh Mr. Kelly said, it is good uh for us to have the debate, the discussion, and to um see different opinions on it. Um after hearing from everybody on the resolution, may I ask for a motion to accept the resolution as amended? Mr. Ignola, a motion. Is there a second? Second. Is there discussion on the motion? Yes, sir. Can we have the motion read into uh the record, please? Miss Baker, would you care to read it? I'm happy to read the motion. Sure. She She's the communication expert. With the amendments in the mic, Sarah, of course. Do you want me to start from the whereas or the be it further resolved uh board of education resolution where whereas it is the right of every child regardless of gender identity, gender expression
021or sexual orientation to access a free public K through2 education and the district welcomes and supports all students. Whereas the district has a responsibility to ensure that all students who reside within its boundaries regardless of gender identity, gender expression or sexual orientation can safely access a free public K through2 education. Whereas the district recognizes that there are employees and educators of the highest caliber who are gay, lesbian, and transgender and that all employees are valued members of the school community regardless of their gender identity, gender expression or sexual orientation. Whereas the district recognizes that the families in our community come in many different forms and the district values all our families and students caregivers regardless of gender identity, gender expression or sexual orientation. Whereas the state of Connecticut prohibits discrimination including discrimination based on gender
022identity, gender expression and sexual orientation. Whereas in a landmark opinion, Boto versus Clayton County decided on June 15, 2020, the United States Supreme Court recognized that discriminating on the basis of actual or perceived sexual orientation or gender identity is always a form of sex discrimination and federal law prohibits sex discrimination in employment and education. Whereas the US Department of Education and the US Department of Justice have recognized that the Supreme Court's reasoning in the Bosetock decision applies to Title 9 of the Education Amendments of 1972, which is Titles Title N, and that Title 9 prohibits discrimination and harassment of students and school employees based on their gender identity and sexual orientation. Whereas Title 9 and other federal civil rights laws prohibiting discrimination on the basis of gender identity and sexual orientation preempt local and state
023laws that conflict and failure to comply with the requirements of Title 9 may jeopardize the district's federal funding. Whereas lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer/questioning, LGBTQ students have experienced high rates of bullying, victimization, and harassment at school on the basis of their actual or perceived sexual orientation or gender identity or that of their associates. Whereas this bullying, victimization, and harassment has led to negative educational outcomes for LGBTQ students, including higher rates of dropping out, higher rates of absenteeism, and lower post-secary aspirations. Whereas LGBTQ students also report higher rates of anxiety and depression, whereas schoolage age years are a critical time for LGBTQ youth and they often come out or to disclose their LGBTQ identities to others during that time. Whereas creating a welcoming and safe school environment for our LGBTQ students, staff, families, and caregivers makes
024our school community more welcoming and safe to all. Whereas the district supports education that celebrates our different identities, integrity in how we treat others, and courage to do what's right by listening to, learning from, and respecting diverse viewpoints. And whereas educational personnel are often the primary sources of support, resources, and information to assist and support students and student learning, which includes their social and emotional health. Now therefore be it resolved that the district prohibits discrimination against all persons whether student family/caregiver of a student or a district employee on the basis of actual or perceived sexual orientation gender identity or gender expression or the actual or perceived sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression of their associates. Be it further resolved that the district prohibits bullying and harassment against all persons, whether student or district employee,
025on the basis of actual or perceived sexual orientation, gender identity, or gender expression, or the actual or perceived sexual orientation, gender identity, or gender expression of their associates. Be it further resolved that the board declares the district to be a safe space for its students. Meaning that the district is a place for students to learn, to thrive, to seek assistance, information, and support free from discrimination and bullying. And as such, teachers and employees of the district are permitted to display LGBTQ rainbow flags as signs of diversity, equity, and inclusion to Stonington students. Be it further resolved that the the district shall within 30 days of the date of this resolution review and modify its anti-discrimination policies to ensure that those policies prohibit LGBTQ discrimination. Be it further resolved that the district shall shall within 30
026days of the date of this resolution work with the re relevant exclusive bargaining representatives to determine how LGBTQ anti-discrimination policies can best be incorporated in existing or future collective bargaining agreements. Be it further resolved, the district shall post this resolution at every school site and distribute it to district staff, students, and parents using usual means of communication, and that the resolution will be translated into all languages spoken by students at home. Be it further resolved, the superintendent shall report back on compliance with this resolution to the board at its next meeting. Be it further resolved that students are to be made aware that the district that district counselors are available to discuss the subjects contained in this resolution. Thank you, Mr. Speaker. [Applause] May any further discussion on the resolution? clarify point through um the
027the next board meeting is less than 30 days from now. So, do you want to clarify? Do you want a status report because we may not have all of these policies reviewed and in place? Just can we get an updating update report? Okay. By the board meeting. Thank you. Perfect. Thank you. Further comments or discussion? All those favor in the resolution, please indicate by saying I. I. That was unanimous. Thank you. Resolution passes. Um, Mr. Kelly, do you have the list for uh and uh we'll start off with Kristen Marshall. [Music] Okay, thank you very much. Elvis Presley, Jimmyi Hendris, men with long hair, Madonna, Marijuana, Tupac, and Tik Tok. Adults will object, but young people are going to be who they are going to be. Is Stonington Public Schools going to provide a space
028where LGBTQ people are accepted or are we telling them that they aren't welcome here? Thank you. My name is Edward Purcell and I live at four Frasier Street in Mystic. Fortunately on the Stonington side of the river. Well, we all make mistakes, but we don't always correct our mistakes, do we? But fortunately, our superintendent, Maryanne Butler, although she might have made a mistake in this case involving the pride flags, then she took the action to reverse that situation. And I'm very glad that she did that. The pride flags are a vital sign to our children, showing that they are welcome at our schools, no matter what their sexual orientation may be. So, I hereby appeal to the board to please keep the flags visible in our schools. Thank you. [Music] Good evening. My name is
029Brendan Cullen and I live on Mayflower Avenue in Pockatuck. I graduated this past summer in the top 10% of the Stonington High School class of 2022. I was deeply involved in the school community as the captain of both the flag squad and math team, the web master of the French honor society as well as being a member of both the Spanish and national honor societies. I am the only student of the class of 2022 to graduate with two seals of biiteracy in both French and Spanish. I am an Eagle Scout with all three bronze, gold, and silver palms of Boy Scout troop 9 based in Pockatuck. I have lived in Pocket Tuck all my life and attended Stonington public schools for all 12 years of my primary and secondary education. But most importantly, I speak
030to you today as a concerned former student of SHS and the immediate past president of the Alliance for Acceptance, a group of LGBT plus students and allies supporting, educating, and advocating for the young LGBT people of Stonington High School. At 14 years old, entering the high school for the first time, I was terrified. As all students in my class were, I was worried about adapting to the new educational environment, beginning my search for college or a career, and fitting in with my new peers. But I quickly realized that the latter would be the hardest task of all. Though the experience was not completely familiar unfamiliar to me, even at such a young age, upon entering high school, I immediately faced the homophobia and bigotry of those around me. I felt unaccepted and isolated from my
031new peers. So, I searched for support and went to the only teacher who I knew would try to help me. She told me about the Alliance for Acceptance. This group of young people quickly became my chosen family and earned me some of the my closest friends that remain in my life today. Being in a community of people like myself made an incredible impact on my self-esteem, confidence, and development into the high achieving young man I am today. Through fundraisers, events, and official representation, we supported the LGBT plus students of SHS. And I had the honor this past school year of being the president of this group of young leaders. I was often approached by younger students asking for advice, help, and an end to the isolation they too felt upon entering their new world. They
032joined the Alliance for Acceptance, and I had the privilege of supporting them in growing up to be more kind, confident, and successful young people. Before leaving SHS to continue my education at the University of Michigan Ann Arbor this year, I wanted to leave a mark on the school that would show the LGBT students coming to SHS that they are loved, supported, and believed in by our school community. A few weeks before my graduation, I and my fellow executive board members of AFA walked around the school distributing various types of pride flags to faculty and staff. Many teachers even requested certain types because they are passionate about supporting young people through the tumultuous times of high school. And because of them, now all LGBT plus students that enter the school can feel the same way I
033did when I went and spoke to my teacher because she was the only teacher of mine who had a small rainbow pride flag sitting in a mug on her desk. Thank you. [Applause] Sarah Garland. Oh man, that's a uh that's a tough act to follow. Thank thanks a lot. Um um well, I did not prepare my speech in advance as I did not realize I was going to get an opportunity to speak tonight. So, please bear with me as I ramble through this. Um, a lot of what I want to say doesn't need to be said because it's already been said very eloquently by some beautiful, wonderful queer folk and allies. Um, so what I would like to comment on is um something that I heard the board comment on tonight, which is concerns about
034um age appropriateness of pride flags and discussing queer folk existing And the deal is that we exist and we have always existed and we always will exist whether you talk about it or not. Um, heteronormative heteronormativity is pushed from day one from ken and Barbie to uh ladies man onesies for small uh small humans assigned male at birth. And none of that is considered age inappropriate. But as soon as you start talking about having representation for a minority group that happens to be a different gender or sexual orientation or expression than what is considered mainstream. It becomes a very big deal and it becomes a age appropriate issue. So, I am very grateful to hear from the administration and to hear from the board and to hear so much support for the people of our
035community. My addition would be to encourage all of y'all and everyone here that taking representation out of schools or anywhere else is not going to make there be fewer queer people. And it's not going to make your children not ever have to interact with queer people because we're everywhere. Sorry. Um, all it's going to do is continue to harm and marginalize and traumatize a group that's already suffering and already having a hard enough time. So I thank I thank the administration and I thank the board and I urge everyone to just consider that pride that nonheterosexuality is not political and it's not age inappropriate any more than a human life is political or age inappropriate. Thank you. [Applause] Robert Taber. Good evening, everyone. I'm I'm going to read this. I'm old and my family tells
036me I ramble if I don't read. So, but but it's pretty short. It's short. Oh, better. How's that? Yeah. Okay. Uh I'm Bob Taber. I live in Boulder Avenue in Stonington. Uh I'm the proud father uh whose two children benefited from their Stonington school system experiences and proud papa uh with grandchildren currently attending Stonington schools. For the record, this res resolution resulted after a reported private meeting of three board of ed uh board of ed members uh intentionally less than a quorum representatives of sea and presumably their respective councils. No parents or general public were invited nor supposedly was there any member of the central office in attendance in person or via Zoom. Mr. Agnello kind of um jumped the gun on me a little bit, but uh I would refer you to the last
037paragraph be it further resolved on the second on the second page which has been discussed briefly. But before proceeding, I would ask everyone to form a mental image of a classroom of classrooms full of first and fourth graders at Deans Middle School. Now from the board's resolution which has been modified I guess be it further resolved the board affirms that certifi certificated you can tell an attorney wrote this uh district uh employees have the academic freedom to discuss this resolution during class time provided it is age appropriate and students are to be made aware that district counselors are available to discuss the subjects contained in this resolution. It begs the question of who in the hierarchy of the school system will be given the authority to determine the age appropriateness for your child or should
038be left up or should it be left up to Stonington parents or guardians to decide when and where to introduce these topics to the ch to their children. Respectfully, it would appear to some that the board not only excluded parental involvement while the resolution was being developed, but now appear to potentially be usurping parental rights and responsibilities of many. Please remember, some of these potentially negative impacted youngsters are still wiping their noses with their sleeves. Well, most boys anyway. Thank you for your time. And thank you for the modification. [Music] Hello, I'm Meg. I live across the street from Westbine Elementary with the snack table that I always tell people to use. And I am here tricked out in my gear. Um, mostly because as a queer youth, I wouldn't have been able to. It
039was not safe to do so. There were no pride flags anywhere in my rural Stituit Rhode Island school, and I would have been at risk of violence, discrimination by my teachers, and potentially other harms. I can't even think of because I was too afraid to be out. But I was queer in first grade. I was queer wiping my nose on my sleeve. I exist. I am not a political ideology. I am not a prop for people to use. I exist. My daughter exists. And my daughter knows that her mother is queer. She knew it soon as she could speak because it's not a scary thing. I appreciate the administration on this and the work that I know went into it and the care and love that Maryanne in particular has for this town and the
040children in this town. I appreciate the board speaking up and getting this done. I appreciate our candidates and our local reps speaking up in support and being active. I appreciate everyone who has come here with a flag or a shirt or a pin, anything that you know, young queer me would have died to see. And I didn't speak up because I didn't want to die. But now things can be better. We should want better. And some parents won't talk to their kids about that. That's why it should be in the schools cuz straight homophobic people can have queer kids and they're at the most risk. So, thank you for your work. Thank you for being here and please continue to protect our children. Thank you. [Applause] Rachel, sorry. Hello, I'm Rachel Fretard. I'm a senior
041at Stonington High School and I wanted to make a statement on behalf of the student body and my lovely friends that joined us today that we are disappointed to see that the district's commitment to equality was so fragile. The rights of students should take precedence over the complaints of parents. It is condescending to assume that children are incapable of making choices about their identity or beliefs. Pride flags are merely a statement of inclusion, not a political statement. We need tangible work done by the administration in order to rectify the damage done by this action. Thank you. [Applause] Melissa Um, I came here tonight um as a parent and a teacher in this community um because I simply wanted to let my students know um publicly that I completely support you um no matter what your
042identity is um what your beliefs are politically or otherwise. Um, and I also wanted to just note that listening to Brendan sitting behind him, I regret that I didn't have him in class. Um, and he's 100% right that those flags were not in every classroom. I've been teaching in Stonington since 2004. And um, I did not have a flag in my classroom until an AFA student came to me and uh, and said, "Hey, would you mind putting this up?" Um, and the same thing with the um I forget what it's called, but we have a little sign, a safe zone sign in our in our classrooms that that most teachers I know of have. Um, and so I think uh clearly my statement is not prepared here, but I think that one of the points
043that we can all take away from this is that we sometimes just don't realize how simple little tiny things can matter to young people. Um, and a little bit tangential, but since it's come up on um, age appropriateness, when my son was three years old, I remember being on the the at the beach with him with um, you know, some other families. And, uh, I remember him coming up to me one day and saying to me, "Hey, mommy," whispering, cuz, you know, three-year-olds are great at that. "Isn't it isn't it true that boys can love boys and girls can love girls?" And I said, "Well, yeah, of course that's true." Um, and he said that he was having an argument with another three-year-old who told him it wasn't true. And, um, so I think, frankly,
044that kids know what they're ready to talk about. And that as a teacher for 23 years, uh, I've found many ways, I mean, luckily I teach high school, but I've found many ways to, uh, change the tone or the phrasing, um, of a conversation to meet the needs of the student that's in front of me. And the same can be true in any home. So think about that if you haven't. Thank you, [Applause] Renee Saltzman. Thank you, Superintendent Butler. Thank you, board members. Um, I I did have a speech prepared, but I'm not going to read it. Um, just because the the comments I've heard in this room from everybody, um, mostly everybody have been really moving. Um, I am a product of the Stonington public school system. I was born and raised here and
045I love my community. Um my wife and I have two children who are currently students at mystic at Stonington sorry old school Stonington Middle School. Um and when our son entered Deans Middle School, my wife and I were nervous. We were worried what is he going to face? You know, having two moms, this what is this experience going to be like for him? Um the administration there was fantastic. But there was work to be done and I look out and I see Miss McCertie and we worked closely together for 3 years to have the power school system changed so that my children could be registered correctly so that they didn't have to miss school field trips because I couldn't enter their I was I was not about to enter their other mother as a father.
046Um for those you know and I look out in this group and I see people that I went to school with and I'm I see people that are coaches and parents of my children's good friends. I see um I'm a coach in the community as well. And for those of you in this room who may be opposing the decision by the board and by the superintendent, um I'm not sure you've ever had a child come home to you with a with a form that says, "Mom, I don't know how to fill this out." That asks about their family. And it says mother and father. um when they're asked to write essays or personal experiences, when they're nervous to talk about their family because they don't know how the other children are going to react. Um
047at the beginning of this year, my our daughter um started middle school. She's in sixth grade. Our son is in eighth grade. If you have middle schoolers, you know, they don't talk a lot to parents. It's hard to to elicit information. They came home from their first day of school so excited to tell me and my wife, "Mom, there are pride flags up in the school this year." They were amazed. It brought joy to them. It made them feel welcome. It made it made them feel that it's okay. I can go into class and I can tell my teacher about my family. I don't have to worry that someone's going to look at me weird or someone's going to ask me a a question that's going to make me uncomfortable because I'm a kid and
048I don't know how to answer it. Um the remarks about the age appropriateness of all of this. My children were kindergarteners and they had two moms. They should be able to go into kindergarten and talk about their family. They should be able to talk about their gay uncle. They should be able to talk about their gay grandparents and not feel scared or nervous. I don't really understand the fear. I'm gonna be completely honest. I don't understand why a symbol makes people afraid. I can promise you a gay pride flag, a rainbow flag is not going to turn your straight child gay. I promise. But if your child happens to be queer or identify as a member of the LGBTQ plus community, that pride symbol may actually reduce the risk that your child will suffer from
049anxiety and depression and suicide. Every 45 seconds in this country, a young person, a young LGBTQ plus person ages 13 to 23 attempts suicide. That's scary. That's a problem that I am grateful that our administration reversed the decision because now we can become part of the solution and not part of the problem. So, thank you. Um, and I'll pass it on. Thanks very much. Catherine Lion. Good evening. Children in Stonington and across all public schools in the United States of America are entitled to a free and safe public education that is inclusive, politically neutral, and curriculum focused. I believe we have been sidetracked at the moment by divisive discussions about flags in the classrooms. I encourage members of the Stonington community to ask questions about the process we have just witnessed. the decision to remove
050flags from classrooms and then the reversal of that decision. Although reports in the press and on social media suggest that a parent complaint about flags was the trigger for the removal decision, my understanding of events is quite different from that. Instead, I believe that flags in conjunction with a classroom activity where students were asked to make assumptions was the reason that the superintendent asked for the flags to be taken down because this situation was in violation of board of ed policy and after legal counsel was sought. This is a different set of facts than in the narrative we have been presented. Multiple versions of what happened would suggest that accuracy, transparency, and good communication from Stonington Public Schools has been compromised. Thank you. [Music] Hi, I'm Andy Feinstein and Mr. Kelly, I'm a education lawyer.
051I just want you to know that. Um, I first want to congratulate the board on passing a really strong, excellent resolution. Second, I heard Superintendent Butler say that she never audited the flags removed. We've now had three, four, five people claim that she did and then reversed herself. And I would ask the the board that I could yield my time to Superintendent Butler to tell us exactly what happened there. Would that be okay? We don't we are not in the practice of uh debating comments from citizens. We always listen. That's our practice, sir. So, if you would like to finish your comments, please go ahead. Very well. Uh I do want to remind people that Superintendent Butler said that she never ordered the removal of flags. And then the third point I want to make
052is while this resolution is terrific and strong, I'm concerned about that we should have similar resolutions on strong anti-discrimination based on sex, religion, race, and particularly disability status. Um, and my concern is that by passing a resolution covering uh gender and gender identity, we seem to perhaps inadvertently reduce the level of protections for those other protected classes who are also subject to discrimination. Thank you, Ashley. tool. Um, good evening. Uh, I would normally say thank you for taking the time to hear our concerns, but the fact that you've opted to share uh the personal opinions before hearing the concerns of your constituents who you're meant me meant to represent means you might not be as concerned as I thought about what we had to say. Although some of my statements that I make tonight might
053be considered unpopular in this room, I feel it is only fair that the board and administration hear opinions other than their own and those who may agree. Just because a topic crosses party lines does not mean that it is not political. The comments on the community forum made it pretty clear that this is in fact not only a political topic but a divisive one at that. When a commentator would suggest that they didn't think the classroom was the appropriate place for a pride flag, they would be called a bigot, homophobe, or right-winger. The fact that political candidates made statements on this topic and were expected to take a side also clearly demonstrates the political nature of this topic. There are plenty of political topics where views cross party lines. That does not mean the issue
054at hand is not political. The pride has in fact been deemed political in schools across the country, but somehow here in Stonington it is not. And I fear that we could be opening up our classrooms to be open forums for public speech. A public classroom must remain neutral and a safe learning environment for all students and may not be the appropriate place to display personal viewpoints. The classroom is where all students should feel safe and accepted for their personal views. And I can only think that the best way to obtain this goal in a space is to keep it neutral. I do have concerns that if a teacher doesn't display a pride flag in their classroom, is it not considered a safe place? Or if a student who has strong religious convictions doesn't feel like
055a room that has a pride flag in it is a safe space for their views. A teacher holds the power in a classroom and it makes me concerned that a child might feel like they have to conform to a teacher's views. Also, does this decision mean that the board of education will only support the pride flag, or are we now allowing for flags that show acceptance and alliance with a group to be displayed in the classroom? Can a classroom fly a thin blue line flag to show solidarity and support with those police officers and their families who are facing a difficult climate in today's society? Again, it's a flag that supports a particular group of people who exist in the community. It crosses party lines, so it must not be political according to the standards
056being used. For every pride flag, is there a head a sexual flag to cover everyone? Where does this end? The board's resolution presented tonight comes across as a prime example of virtue signaling. Many of these statements made in this resolution are in our school policies. Our school already follows these standards and if they're not being enforced, that's a different issue, but we cover these topics because they mattered from the beginning. Students are supposed to be protected from bullying regardless of their sexual preferences. But do these statements degregate from those students who are bullied but are not part of the LGBTQ community? The resolution only discussed protection for certain students and I think the board and administration could be treading on some serious shaky grounds. I am not blind to the struggles that are faced by
057this community, but I do think that we need to as administration and board be careful with the precedents we are setting. Bullying is not acceptable on any terms. And I also wanted to thank Kevin um for discussing that last paragraph of the resolution. I think that that um could create a lot of issues as well. And I just want to implore the board and our administration to really take a look at this. We do have policies in place regarding this. And I find it hard to say that this is not a political topic. Not saying that somebody being gay is political in nature, but the flag itself, although not in the way it was created, has become political, not by the actions of any of us, but through today's society. And I just think we
058need to make sure that we are creating safe learning space for all students, regardless of their sexual preferences, regardless of their religious convictions, regardless of their gender identity. It needs to be safe for all students. And I just want to make sure that moving forward that we take that in mind and that we create a learning environment that is a productive space for all Stonington students. Thank you. [Applause] That's it, sir. Thank you. I'm sorry. U do you can we can we have your name and address, please? Paul Sarter. Got it. Sorry about that. Technically challenged. Very old. Um, thank you very much. It's Paul Sarter. S A R T O R 12 Jackson Avenue in Mystic. Uh, this was uh I came in here. I raised four children through the school system. Uh my
059youngest is 25, my oldest is 33. Um I was very involved from the get-go when my oldest child was five in the PTO and uh was one of the uh founders of Stoned Education Fund and was president for 20 years. Uh I I chaired our building committee that built the high school uh that built our fields that we have right now. have been involved with a lot of different things and I'm I'm it's it's it's not to impress, it's just to let you know that I've been around a little while and um this was very enlightening. I have to say I didn't come in I came in with somewhat of a a perspective, but I really appreciate the young people that spoke, the teachers that spoke. Uh and I and I got to say it's
060not on I don't see two sides here. I really don't. I think in in one case I think it's it's pretty sad that so many people need uh the uh rainbow flag to feel comfortable. That's sad. That's a that's a a sad statement for our community and I I hope that and and I'm surprised that it's still it's still that way in uh in Stonington. Um, I ne I never I didn't think it was there was that type of discrimination. Uh, yet I hope someday we can get to a point where that's not necessary. That we don't have to point out that see that person or that group of people like we used to when we grew up. I know there was gay and there was LGBT children even when I was younger. I know
061that. Um, I have them in my family. Them. Sorry, I didn't mean a them. You know what I mean? uh because we're all in the uh in the likeness of God. We're all loved and we all should be loved. And as the previous speaker uh said, uh no child, whether he's fat or skinny or has acne or has red hair or or bald or had cancer cuz he went through he or she went through chemotherapy or uh going through some or is an LGBTQ plus identifies as that person. Uh, I'm also sad and I'm I'm not only sad that we need these flags because I really don't think we should. I'm not saying that we don't. I just don't think we should. Uh, because as the previous speaker said, it really is political. It shouldn't
062be, but you can't deny it. It is. It was stated that way by uh, Miss Simmons. And I also appreciate Mr. Maggnelo with his comment. Uh, I'm sorry that you had to pay lawyers an awful lot of money to say the same thing over three, four, five, I don't know how many paragraphs you did when all that really needs to be said is the golden rule. Treat everyone as you'd like to be treated. I looked at the I looked at the uh website of each one of our schools. Each one of our schools has a motto. We have a school district with a motto and it fits everything. It tells everybody that everybody must be welcome. Uh, everybody, regardless of anything, is supposed to be welcome. We have laws that say everyone is supposed to
063be welcome. We have laws that say no one should be discriminated against. I I I I'm glad I'm not raising children right now. Um, again, I understand I I don't really have a a strong opinion one way or the other here, but I I want to say that both sides uh got to me as an old guy who raised kids for 25 years. So, I appreciate all the speakers as someone who's in Mystic and was ready to just check out of the school district after spending 30 years of my time spending literally tens of thousands of hours uh volunteering and raising half a million dollars and building schools for everyone's kids regardless of who they are and in fact neglecting my own for your kids and I was happy to do it. So, I hope
064our community can get together uh on this issue. I don't have a solution. Uh maybe you won't see me for a while again, but uh thank you very much. I know I took too much time. Thank you very much. [Applause] My name is Michael Freeman. I'm the president of the Stonington Education Association, which is the teachers union. There's just been a couple inaccuracies tonight that I I wasn't going to speak, but I can't let stand. The superintendent did not send 200 teachers a letter telling them to clear anything out of their classrooms. There was a very sensitive email sent to the administrative leaders of the building that there was a concern brought up and so approximately six teachers were approached to remove items and I told them personally I hoped it would be temporary. From
065the very beginning the superintendent made me aware of what was going on and I met with every one of those teachers to make sure they were okay. More importantly, there was a discussion about uh non-transparency in the bargaining unit with the union and the school board. We have a discussion committee clause that I invoked. It was a union meeting, not a board of ed meeting. So, if there's anybody to blame about a lack of transparency, I'm standing right here. Thirdly, I met with the AFA group the other day, and I'm a proud teacher of 36 years in this school district. The school district was talking the talk with what the kids perceived as dead words and a DEI program and curriculum. Now, we're not just talking the talk, we're walking the walk. And those kids
066are the bravest kids I've ever met. [Music] [Applause] [Music] That was all the speakers for the night. Next item on our agenda is a German of the meeting. Motion to adjourn the meeting. Second. All those in favor, please indicate by saying I. I. I. That was unanimous. Thank you.